Behind The Pen: How Marriage Works
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Primary Language: English
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Onion editorial cartoonist Stan Kelly is one of the world's top opinion-makers. He gets up close and personal in this new video series. See the cartoon, Holy Matri-Money, here: http://onion.com/J2eGs (More)
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00:00:03 00:00:06 This is Stan Kelly. Is that what you're looking for?
00:00:06 00:00:08 - Behind the Pen -
00:00:08 00:00:11 So, my editor, ??? says, so we want to make a video
00:00:12 00:00:15 of your cartoon that we're going to put on the computer.
00:00:15 00:00:17 And I said, I don't see the value in that.
00:00:17 00:00:21 And he said, Kelly, some young people who have never seen your cartoon
00:00:21 00:00:23 might discover your cartoon.
00:00:23 00:00:25 If I can just reach one young person.
00:00:26 00:00:27 If I can set just one more youngster straight
00:00:28 00:00:31 with my message. If I can. I don't do this for me.
00:00:31 00:00:34 I don't get any money. No, I don't get a red cent
00:00:34 00:00:37 for spending my time doing this video. But it's not for me.
00:00:37 00:00:39 I'm doing it for you. I'm doing it for that youngster.
00:00:39 00:00:41 Okay. Let's get on with this.
00:00:42 00:00:43 - This Week's Installment "Holy Matri-Money" -
00:00:44 00:00:45 The cartoon for this week is about a marriage.
00:00:46 00:00:48 A young happy couple ???. Their cake.
00:00:49 00:00:52 People drinking champagne. There's a little champagne glass there.
00:00:52 00:00:54 And there's rice falling. Everybody's happy.
00:00:54 00:00:56 It's a magical innocent moment of youth.
00:00:57 00:00:58 Future is bright for this young couple.
00:00:58 00:01:00 But no, no look what happens.
00:01:00 00:01:02 Shazam, you get to the next panel.
00:01:03 00:01:05 Look at that, it's dark, sad.
00:01:05 00:01:09 That's the secret to humor. You give people something they don't expect.
00:01:09 00:01:12 See, you go back to this first panel. This guy,
00:01:12 00:01:13 he doesn't know what's going to hit him.
00:01:13 00:01:16 He doesn't know what's coming to him. Look out for that knife, buddy.
00:01:16 00:01:17 You think you're cutting a cake.
00:01:17 00:01:19 That knife is going to strike you right in the back.
00:01:20 00:01:22 It's going to, it's going to cut out your heart.
00:01:22 00:01:24 It's going after your wallet, is what it's going after.
00:01:25 00:01:26 That knife, okay.
00:01:26 00:01:28 And that wife, she's holding that knife.
00:01:28 00:01:29 See how she's holding that knife in that picture?
00:01:29 00:01:31 Yeah, she's going to take control of that knife.
00:01:31 00:01:33 And she's going to be stabbing you right in the back.
00:01:33 00:01:35 It's going to be a stick up, is what it's going to be.
00:01:35 00:01:38 And that poor guy. My heart goes out to this guy.
00:01:38 00:01:40 I believe yours does too.
00:01:40 00:01:41 America's heart goes out to this guy.
00:01:42 00:01:43 Because the every-man, see.
00:01:43 00:01:45 That's the every man's experience in this country.
00:01:45 00:01:47 This is what happens in America, see.
00:01:47 00:01:48 There's a poor innocent guy. He's living his life.
00:01:49 00:01:50 He's just trying to be happy. He's sitting back.
00:01:50 00:01:53 He's having a nice drink after work. But what does he get?
00:01:53 00:01:54 Does he get thanks? Does he get gratitude?
00:01:55 00:01:56 No, he gets nothing but nagging.
00:01:57 00:01:58 The nagging is going to get him.
00:01:58 00:02:00 She's going to nag him about his alimony payments.
00:02:01 00:02:02 About his childcare payments.
00:02:02 00:02:03 She's going to say, quit drinking.
00:02:03 00:02:06 And he's innocent, see. He's the underdog.
00:02:06 00:02:08 He's fighting against impossible odds.
00:02:08 00:02:10 Innocent ex-husbands, that's what I wrote on him,
00:02:10 00:02:12 because that's what he is, okay?
00:02:12 00:02:13 And here's the real sad thing.
00:02:14 00:02:16 You think you can get away from all that nagging
00:02:16 00:02:18 by getting divorced, but you can't. It stays with you.
00:02:18 00:02:21 - The last Word -
00:02:22 00:02:24 Now, those of you who don't know my work,
00:02:24 00:02:26 at the end I always put a little comment for myself there.
00:02:27 00:02:29 I like to have the last word in my cartoons, see.
00:02:30 00:02:31 So, here, 'til death do you part.
00:02:31 00:02:32 That's what I mean.
00:02:32 00:02:35 You get the nagging until you die. Okay.
00:02:35 00:02:37 This is how the artist works.
00:02:37 00:02:39 See, he takes a sadness and he twists it, see.
00:02:39 00:02:42 He twists it. He turns it into something that's entertaining
00:02:42 00:02:43 for you folks.
00:02:44 00:02:45 And that's what won me the Thornsberg Brown's Quill award
00:02:46 00:02:47 for excellence in cartooning.
00:02:47 00:02:50 Okay, that kind of artistry.
00:02:50 00:02:52 - Kelly -
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