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Thank you for coming.
My name is Grover Norquist, |
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00:00:07 |
President of Americans
for Tax Reform. |
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00:00:10 |
Over the last weeks,
some very illicit, |
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00:00:11 |
very scandalous images
|
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of myself carousing with taxes
have surfaced. |
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And while I at first attempted
to deny that I had ever had |
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00:00:22 |
any romantic dalliances
with taxes, |
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I would like to take
this opportunity |
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to say that the photographs
are in fact authentic, |
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00:00:32 |
the tweets are of my personal
1040 statements |
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00:00:36 |
and that over the last 28 years
I have carried on multiple affairs |
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00:00:40 |
with numerous kinds of taxes,
income taxes, sales taxes |
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00:00:42 |
and even estate taxes.
|
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00:00:46 |
First and foremost I would like
to apologize to my family |
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who knew me
as a devoted family man |
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and the leader of a powerful
anti-tax movement. |
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In actuality I was leading
a selfishly double life |
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00:00:59 |
buying presents for
and taking exotic trips with |
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capital gains taxes
and transfer taxes. |
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00:01:08 |
In 2004 I engaged in a week-long,
drug-fueled orgy |
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with corporate income taxes,
|
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a decision I now
wholeheartedly regret. |
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00:01:18 |
And in 2010, at the height of
my misconduct, while in Paris, |
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I strongly flirted with a
European-style value-added tax. |
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00:01:26 |
At this time I would like
to ask the media |
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to respect my family's privacy
as we work through this ordeal |
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00:01:34 |
and also to respect
the privacy of taxes |
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which I realize through
my numerous encounters |
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can actually be fair, decent
and even loving, |
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especially expatriation taxes.
|
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I think I will miss
our wonderful evenings the most. |
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Thank you very much.
-Mr. Norquist! -Mr. Norquist! |
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No questions at this time.
Thank you. |