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Onion News Network
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Today Now!
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Stay tuned, a little later in the hour,
we're going to talk about |
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what to do if your child
is too sweaty. |
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But first, another celebrity
has traveled to Africa, |
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to bring back an exciting addition
to her family. |
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Today, Jennifer Aniston arrived
in Ethiopia to sign the final papers, |
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to adopt a 33 year old man
named Nagassi. |
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An adoption agency right here
in the US, |
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helped Jen secure Nagassi from
the east African orphanage, |
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where he was a part time
grounds keeper. |
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Yes, and for more, let's check in
with our own, |
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Onion News Network
entertainment reporter, Alex Blair. |
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-Hey there guys.
-It sounds like great news for Jen. |
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Oh, it is Tracy, Jen's friends
and family are just so excited |
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that she'll finally have someone
to share her life with. |
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-Right.
-For years she's tried unsuccessfully, |
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to get a man the natural way.
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-Oh, and now that she's getting older.
-Yeah, exactly. |
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When Jen realized she couldn't secure
a man in America, |
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she started looking into alternative methods
of finding a man, |
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and that brought her
to an adoption agency. |
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-Right.
-Ooh, I bet he took to her right away. |
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Not exactly Tracy.
At first he was a little shy. |
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-Sure.
-But Jen wasn't worried, you guys. |
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She apparently took him
in her arms and said, |
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"you're mine now, you'll be with me forever,
you're not going anywhere". |
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-He's really cute.
-Yeah. |
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These photos come from the day Jen took
Nagassi to a wildlife preserve in Kenya. |
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Alex, they already look like a family.
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-Oh, that's so nice.
-Isn't it? |
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Now I hear that Nagassi recently
threw a little tantrum. |
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-Oh, oh.
-Yes, well friends say Nagassi |
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was upset with Jen because he wanted
to go back to his home and his family, |
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so Jen sent him to her room and made
him stay there with her for a few days, |
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until he calmed down.
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It's very important to be strict,
at least in the beginning. |
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-Sure.
-It really is. |
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Now to be fair, she has been facing
some criticism though, hasn't she Alex? |
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Well, that's true Jim,
Nagassi will be leaving |
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a wife and two children
behind in Ethiopia, |
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but Jen has set up a very generous
charitable fund for their village. |
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Oh, I love her.
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Well we wish them all the best of luck,
don't we? |
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-We sure do.
-And thank you so much Alex, |
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for being with us this morning.
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Sure thing guys.
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Now of course this is
the second time Jennifer Aniston |
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has tried to aquire
a man from overseas, |
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following last year's attempt
to smuggle in |
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that twenty nine year rice farmer
from Cambodia, |
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who tragically died in his shipping
container on the voyage over. |
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That Jen, she's just had the worst luck.
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She really has, alright,
right after the break, |
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we're going to check in with
our own chef, Adam Scott, |
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who is covering the violence
over in Afghanistan. |
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Still ahead this hour...
|
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00:02:14 |
How to unlead your own gasoline.
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